Menstrual Mayhem

…Because menstruation HAPPENS!
” While I’ve never felt ashamed to mention my period, or to whine and mope around in front of anyone, I am often surprised to receive more empathy and care from the bastards who weren’t born with a baby making machine, compared to those who do bleed regularly…”

Alternative Thoughts

10957990_10155178593180182_585274568_nThere is a subject that I often ponder discussing, usually around the end of each month.

While a particular friend of mine repeatedly encourages me to  go all out on the oh so (somehow) controversially taboo topic, I have remained reluctant.

It wasn’t until I was reading the legendary Lena Dunham’s ‘Not That Kind of Girl’ book, that I identified exactly what was holding me back.

The title of the book encapsulates my struggle perfectly- I could not fathom the thought of y’all perceiving me as typical female who dramatically complains about the agony that is: menstruation.

But guess what?? I am a girl. I am often dramatic. Once a month I lay an egg and it’s the fucking pits. I HATE EVERY SECOND OF IT.

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EVERY single part of the stereotype I fulfil, from the moody weeks before Aunt Flow arrives, involving hot sweats, irrational outbursts…

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Embrace the Crazy

Source: Are all women crazy?

“Admitting that there’s some level of ‘crazy’ in us isn’t a defamation of femininity or slander against women. I’m not denouncing feminism or suggesting that we pander to stereotypes. It’s just a tiny truth about being a woman…”

#Gramspam

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https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=wQdcCiVb59g

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

I spent a lot of my holidays with my brain and phone off, which was rather delicious. During the coconut & colada reclining sesh, I did however view the above video.

Being a (former) Gaga skeptic, I planned to dedicate approx five minutes of my demanding schedule to the ‘clown’ – who quickly slapped my ignorance in the face with absolute brilliance.

For once I am not going to impose my opinions on y’all- instead I’ve decided to leave the link to the hour long interview here, for leisurely viewing.

The video perfectly articulates my views on social media and mental health/ illness– SO, SO ELOQUENTLY.

As the techno slaves we are swiftly becoming, It’s more important than ever to gain some control over the shit that now determines our moods.

So, I thought I would use this platform to lightly suggest some worthy Gram follows.

(Randomly) listed below are some of the accounts that keep me #stable, #happy, #inspired and #LOLing through this thang’ called life, in 2016!

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You Sound Like You’re From London!


“WHERE ARE YOU FROM?”

-It’s a question I get asked on the reg, in different forms, across all kinda contexts.

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Perception is a funny thing- from ‘white chocolate’ to Albanian, I’ve gotten it all, and it’s cool; I’m all about multiculturalism- especially when my friends adopt me as part of their ethnic crews.

However, no matter how much sangria I consume, curry I devour or Italian stallions I drool over, there’s a tiny fact that only a few of my pals have been able to identify.

Apart from the frequent “you sound like you’re from London” observation from strangers, the degree to which I’m a MASSIVE Brit/ POM at heart has gone unnoticed.

While my undying love for London town, including Harry & Wills; my besties that feel the need to reside there (as well as it’s ridiculously close proximity to Italia and olay- town) is no secret, there is something else that fuels my bond with the motherland…

And that is… British TV. (DON’T JUDGE!)

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I started young, with late night viewings of the BILL and the Vicar of Dibley, and progressed to AB FAB (which could explain a lot about my adulthood).

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The love matured however when I discovered TOWIE and Made in Chelsea, and it continues to flourish as I navigate my way through the early years of adulthood, stumbling and (hopefully) growing along side Louise & Spenny.

There is something comforting about watching people of a similar age making the same fuck- ups, being slapped in the face by the same lessons and experiencing just as much confusion and disillusion (and of course oodles of fun).

The bond between the viewers and the botoxed beauties is one that cannot be explained, it is felt across oceans and screens.

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It is developed, not through the piss ups and overt vanity, but in the vulnerability and hurt that is felt and shown, especially in relationships (/ failed attempts at that love thang).

There is one particular gal that I want to fly over and cuddle. Up until the last ep of Made in Chelsea, poor Binky has been bloody unlucky in love. Not because she’s a dud, but because people can be A-holes.

After being repeatedly cheated on by a dickhead named Alex, Binks took her time to heal.

During this time, another (delicious) man took a liking to her, and pursued the brunette beauty for about six months (of viewing).

JP seemed SO promising- having never been in a relationship, but being a great mate to all, he was considered to be the ultimate good guy.

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While he continually delivered in his attempt to woo Binks, the height of our hopes grew, as Binky very slowly softened her walls.

Like all modern tinder- ships seem to do- Binky and JP got to the stage where they’d out grown the situation-ship and an ultimatum had to be given.

Despite the fear and doubt Binky had about relationships and being rejected/ hurt by JP, she decided (with the extremely ironic guidance of Alex himself who believes she deserves a good guy– LOL) she threw it aside, downed some champers and asked the boi out herself.

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…And do you know what he said???

SOZ, you’ve got too much baggage.

…..

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I was disgusted to say the least, as were the Chelsea sisterhood who put JP firmly in his place.

This is what us humans do!

We JUDGE people on the ways in which OTHERS have treated them, hurt them and the insecurities that have manifested.

We base our perceptions on the company people keep, the places they go and music they like.

For relationship virgins– we assume there’s something wrong, and the same judgement is made about damaged goods.

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The JP & Binky ordeal left me wondering what exactly the perfect criteria for a 20- something bachelor/ bachelorette is…

It seems that love has become a small element of a large list that has been determined by failed experiences and Hollywood illusions. (I’m sure a few mummy/daddy complex’s are mixed in there too)..

-Are we really in tune with ‘that’ connection? or is our view shaded by superficial shit? Do we fall for a person because of who they actually are, or who we think they are or want them to be?

-How many soul mate opportunities are we passing up for easy or safe options?

-Why don’t we listen to our instincts more?

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Over the years, Essex and Chelsea fans have watched girls (and occasionally guys) questions their partners loyalty– sometimes in response to rumours and sometimes solely because of ‘that’ gut feeling. Every single suspicion has been spot on.

I think, that if we paid more attention to our inner shit, so many wrong relationships may be avoided- creating space for the right ones.

[case in point– Binky knew something wasn’t right about  JP, and yet she blanked her feelings in response to her pals pressure].

.. Do y’all seee how much soul searching can manifest from some illegally downloaded reality TV? It has gotta’ be British though, that’s a must 😉

Happy Thursday!

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Sex, Love & Kale

August marked a year since I first challenged my ego and risked my angelic reputation by publicly word vomiting my opinions onto WordPress.com !

While a few pals had been pushing me to do something with my communications degree (other than practise my stalking/ investigative skills) for a while, it took a hung- dog Saturday morning state to fuel my oh- so feminist outburst about trolling, body shaming & the mighty media in general.

And ever since I slammed the lappy screen shut in a hot ball of anxiety, I have been overwhelmed and pleasantly surprised by the variety of respondents and responses to my overtly opinionated alternative thoughts!

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Being the overly analytical psych student that I am, the degree to which I froth while monitoring the many ways in which my words trigger reactions is barely surprising. What is kinda interesting however, is that amount of curiosity many of y’all seem to have also.

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So… I thought I would follow in the wise and wonderful footsteps of a good friend who, on every birthday, takes it upon himself to educate the FB world on the shit he’s learnt over the past 12 months of life.

Now, before you close the tab at the fear of a self indulgent exploration of my personal development and Ghandi-like enlightenment, CHILL. This aint’ alllll about me (there are elements, though #sorrynotsorry).

To keep your interest and ‘up’ my following, I have compiled 3 easy to follow, insightful and (hopefully) LOL- worthy lists for the sticky beak in all of us:

What YOU (readers/ stalkers/ feed backers) LIKE: 

  • HONESTY

Regardless of the topic, the dirtier/ grittier and rawer the writing, the richer the response (surprise!)

As a slightly blunt and opinionated person, I have been conscious of being ‘balanced’ and ‘controlled’ in my views, in an attempt to avoid criticism/ offending the softer petals out there. However, it seems the more I dish it out, the more the readership and respect has grown.

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Whether its sex, politics or kale, y’all like to keep it real.

  • AUTHENTICITY

While I was initially reluctant as feck to open up to the extent I have done, it turns out that sharing our stories is rather therapeutic and empowering for fellow humans… especially when it comes to #L0V3. WHO KNEW?!

  • WHINGING

It’s no secret we all love a cheeky bitch session. Alternative Thoughts has strengthened this truth, particularly when it comes to:

> social rules/expectations

> gender norms + sexism (especially towards MEN)

> bullshitters

> body shaming

  • LOVE

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Well, it seems that we love to hate love, love to love love, and are bloody perplexed by the concept all together. We seem avoid it and seek it all at once.. hence the tinder culture of commitment phobes & situation-ships.

  • BOOZE, FOOD & TRAVEL

For obvious reasons.

  • SEX

Putting the ‘buzz‘ in buzzwords, it really does sell (haha).

The HATE train includes:

  •  HIPSTERS ‘n’ HIPPIES

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Anyone remember my post- farmers market rant about the latest trend of insta- hippies who sip on coconuts while taking bare foot selfies and munching on their daily carrot stick? well that little post made it big in the blogging world (it’s legit read every day).

  • JUDGEMENT

Of others, and of our own life choices, regardless of what they are. Freedom and Equality for all, y’all!

  • RACISM

Apparently it’s a no-go zone in the white world…

  • POSITIVITY

 It seems that anytime I have my rosy- coloured glasses on, encourage an optimistic perspective, or hint at embracing a stable lifestyle, the band wagon suffers… #cray

Things we LOVE 2 HATE:

  • THE MEDIA

We hate the power the media holds. We hate their manipulative ways, the messages being communicated and the damaging effects of propaganda.

We also hate the trolling and bullying that manifests behind the screens. We are sickened by filters and the insular, vain values the gram promotes.

And yet, we continue to scroll, continue to post, continue to be influenced. The struggle is REAL.

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  • LOVE

Because, Love.

  • Feeding our Egos

Because we are human.

And there ya have it~ I’m at 700 words , which means I need to shut up ASAP or ratings will plummet. ( We are lazy and impatient, in case you forgot).

Thanks for following along, I’m always open to suggestions and alternative opinions!

Happy Tuesday!